it’s magic!!! hehehe.. 
things are doing great for both of us. we’ve surpassed a lot of storms and we’ll be facing more.. together and stronger.
We remain steadfast as long as we still hold in each other the love we shared the past years.
more years to come!!! i love you RANDO!!! muah!!!
*cheers to eternity!*
What can I say about the guy I love for more than four years? That I love the way he smiles, the way he laughs at me, the way he kisses me, the way he talks about anything that happened to him the whole day… and the list goes on, because I simply love everything about him. This four years we spent together is only a while, and I know that I haven’t yet given all the love that I can give for him; but I know I love him earnestly and dearly, and I’m willing to take the risks of loving too much.
Before he became mine, I know something’s missing within me. I feel so incomplete. I thought I’d never find a man who’ll love me for who I am. I thought I’d never find a man who’ll accept and love both the good and bad side of me. I thought I’d never find a man who’s willing to commit himself into a serious relationship. But then he came into my life and turned my thoughts the other way around. He came, and touched my life, and made me whole again.
I’ve never met and known a man like him. He’s so sweet, nice, loving, thoughtful, and caring, he makes me laugh, he makes me happy, he never fails to tell me, show me and make me feel how much I am loved, and beyond doubt he’s faithful and sincere. I feel secured and never doubted his actions in any way. I know these words are not enough to describe the entirety of him. He’s everything that I wanted and needed. There’s nothing more that I could ever ask for.
He is my brother, my best friend, my lover, my everything. I couldn’t imagine how my life would be so empty without him. Just the thought of losing him hurts more than I got hurt when letting go of my first love. Maybe he doesn’t know this, he is my inspiration; why I want to fulfill my dreams, why I want to go on with my life (though shit happens), and why I want to live long was all because of him. He is also my source of strength when everything turns bleak and whenever I am down. But then I realizead that my strength is also my weakness.
I just couldn’t help myself falling for him more and more as the days go by. It was that my world almost spun around him. He was all I hoped for to be with until the day that I’ll die. He was all I wished for, nothing more nothing less.
I was too certain to say that he is really meant for me, my soulmate, my destiny, that he’d be my future husband, the father of my kids, my partner for life. Again, he became my inspiration to have something to look forward to for the future. Thus, I realized the existence of my whole being.
But then, this certainty I have seems to become vague. Something suddenly changed. I gave everything to him, I thought things would still be the same. But it was not. I couldn’t find myself anymore, nor could I find myself in him. I feel incomplete, doubtful and insecure. I do not blame him, nor regret for giving everything out, but it’s just that after all that happened, day after day, my fear of losing him grows.
In the past months, I have been acting different lately (I know he noticed it too); I’ve become over-possessive with him, cranky, and short-tempered. I have been too selfish that I would want him to spill most of his attention to me. I am a paranoid. I know it’s not me at all, but I didn’t mean to be like that. I couldn’t help myself from thinking that he’s taking me for granted and many times I doubted his love for me. Why? Because knowing that I have given everything made me feel so insecure, and again, I felt that something’s missing in me – incomplete to be exact.
I could no longer find anything special nor wonderful in our relationship right now for we are stuck up in this sensual phase, we’re not growing together and I hate it. But what can I do? I can be wrong, but for him, I‘d do anything just to please him. I’d hold on to him (as long as I can) even though sometimes it hurts because I love him so much more than I love myself. I may sound stupid or foolish, but you just don’t know, you just don’t understand how I feel.
I do not know, even the slightest idea of what tomorrow will bring us together. But I’m just hoping that these insecurities will come to an end and I hope to bring back my old self – the one he used to know, the one he used to love. Or maybe, I’ll just have myself ready and expect the unexpected.
It’s not going to be easy, I know.
*I don’t know how to express these thoughts that linger me, this is my only way (i guess)*
it’s past 2am.. and i’m not yet home XD.. we had our 3-11 duty and right after that we went straight at BoyzTrek and played dota… heheh.. 
the game was fun (tae sila dadi n adrian!!! shame on you!!! hehehe peace ^^v). bunny hunting was really fun.. heheh.
that’s all… bow!
we had our 3-hour class yesterday and our topic was all about sexuality. the topic could be quite interesting since everybody in the class is alert and actively participating, but i wasn’t at my right thinking that time. oftentimes did the teacher called my attention cause i wasn’t listening attentively, and i had those noticable blank stares (that’s what my seatmate said); often times my mind wanders.. and that time i was thinkin about love.. i may sound too mushy here, but oh well just don’t mind this blog and get the hell out of here.. hehehe.. :XD
Don’t know where and how to start… maybe i’ll start with a question… hehehhe.. XD
Ever had a crush on someone who would bring you sleepless nights?
Ever longed for someone who keeps on crossing your mind every second of the day?
Have you ever fallen for someone that you thought you can’t let go, nor live without?
So, you call it love? Or is it just a feeling of a romantic excitement?
well, come to think of these few lines that i’m gonna share you in which i can be right or i may be wrong..
If you love someone because of he/she makes you think about him/her, or makes you forget to study and not eat, or makes your heart beat whenever he/she passes your way… it’s not love… it’s just a mere feeling of infatuation.
If you love someone because of his/her intelligence, point of view, or insight about life.. it’s not love.. it’s admiration.
If you love someone because he/she cries every time you try to leave him/her, or he/she tells you he/she couldn’t live without you, or because you made a promise that you’ll not leave him/her… it’s not love.. it’s pity.
If you love someone because of his/her pretty face, or his/her eyes, or his/her lips or his/her great and sexy body.. it’s not love… it’s lust.
There’s a lot more to say that something is just a mere something and it is not love…
What then is love? even i couldn’t get an EXACT answer of what love is.. all i know is that love is ABSOLUTE…
have you ever asked your bf/gf why does he/she loves you? (it’s not wrong to ask anyway)if he/she answers "it’s because you are blah blah blah.." don’t get flattered(you know what i mean?). But, if he/she answers that he/she loves you but doesn’t know why.. smile ^_^
They say that love has its reason.. and that reason is unknown..
Can be true, but i doubt it.. what i believe is love has its reason… and the reason itself is LOVE.
Does anyone agree with me? Hehehe..
wla lang… now back to my ‘research’ work… XD
went skimboarding with my barkada the whole day last jan 2.. that was really really fun… it’s so easy if you’re watching, but once you try it, damn it!! you’ve got to have strong bones ~_^..ehehe.. it’s only easy [lolz...] you just have to run, drop, ride… and Fall!! hahha no pain no gain.. XD
Christmas is fast approaching…. but it’s not a ‘weee’ or a ‘yahoo!’ for me… it’s the first christmas without my dad… it’s been 8 months since my dad left for U.S. and i’m missin him soooo much… T_T
nothing more to say…. i just miss him…
it’s raining really hard… we were not able to finish our cp which is due tommorow… i’m leaving davao… i’ll be away… and i’m not happy…
what if i’m gonna die during my travel? hahha.. lolz… can’t keep myself from thinkin about it. dunno why…XD
i’m tired… don’t even know if i can rest in Digos… for sure, i’ll be havin 3 sleepless nights again…with my groupm8s around i doubt it if i can sleep well… hehehe.. peace out!!!
as what the title says…
got nothing to do… i should be home by now.. haven’t packed my things yet lazy bones… i’ll be away for 3 days.. and i’m leavin the house tomorrow at 4am +_+
golly, it’s a tiring day…
woot! played dota wit my gwoupmwates all aftoinoon.. ^_^ that was fun.. ha! just learned a new char..
after that we ate dinner at vulcachow.. hahaha.. unlimited rice!!! ate a lot till i can no longer close the lock and zip of my pants (yay! it’s true!! >.< ) but that dinner was nothing compared when we ate there last time and i was able to eat 6 cups of rice (my friends made it to 8 cups!) O_o wonder where did i put all that i eat?! that i do not know… ^_^
:gonk:
Youve heard about it. 24 hours a day 7 days a week fun, non-stop txting (and start growing callouses lolz). With its mass appeal, it spawned a large number of 24/7 txters. Who wouldn’t want to avail it? for as low as P15 you can send more than a hundred text messages per day o_O; saves more and it’s practical, isn’t it? Unfortunately, unlimited text messaging, like most fads, is two-faced; it’s both BOON and BANE. Unli txt msging per se is good, since it doesn’t cost you a lot ^_^. However, some unscrupulous individuals have used it as a means of passing on and exchanging gross and sexually provocative information (hmmm..sounds a little mushy). Not only that, many of the messages you receive range from the silly to the sinister. Yeah I know it’s not all the time you receive those kinds of messages. Coz’ on the other hand, there are also other individuals who share inspiring thoughts, and quotes about love, friendship, betrayal, tragedy, happiness, and the like.
As far as I know a lot of people are hooked with this ‘unli’ thingy, including me hehehe. So what comes next? Well… now and then your inbox becomes flooded with different kinds of messages from different people; some are from friends, some are least expected to be sending you txt msgs, and some are even from anonymous people. Haven’t you figured it out yet? Hmmm… think think think… The messages you receive no longer make sense, even if it is an inspiring, touching or a happy thought. Who knows if the message is REALLY intended FOR YOU or maybe, the sender used the ‘send to many/list/group’ options, and luckily, your name was just included. Come to think of it, without the unli txt msging, do you think you can still receive sweet, silly, nice, naughty or ‘how are you’ messages from time to time? Perhaps not, but if you got one or two, be happy… at least you know… it’s not crap… =)
Anyway, it’s only MY opinion.. It’s no big deal anyway. Si Daniel C*lin*. man gud ba flooder sa akong inbox!!!! (sent me 100+ msgs in less than half an hour..unya walay sulod!!! +_+ Napugos hinuon ko mag-delete all msgs sa akong inbox) Grrrr… t(^_^t) Hehehe.. Beware of that person flooder na siya!!! Bahala mo kapoy ug erase sa mga nonsense msgs. Hehehe..
Peace out!! ^_^
I do not have any intention to strike any network ^_^ so peace..
